Identity is a small word but implies a lot of things. The way I see myself is probably a lot different than how someone else identifies me. The more you get to know someone, the more you are able to understand their true identity, not just what you see on the surface. For instance, to a lot of people at this school, my identity is "Soccer Player". People probably see me with MTU Women's Soccer apparel on walking around campus and think, oh, she's a soccer player. They might see me on a poster up at the SDC advertising the next game and think, oh yeah I think she's in one of my classes.. huh, she's a soccer player, okay. But to others, I am known as much more than just "Soccer Player". My teammates are the people that have spent the most time with me so of course they are going to know a lot more about me than someone who sees me in passing once a week or sits behind me in a class. My teammates see me not only as a soccer player, but an extreme goofball, a slightly above average student, a wanna be singer/hip-hop dancer. They know I hate losing with almost all of my being, that I will do pretty much anything for ice cream, and that I believe in Jesus. They know basically everything there is about me, and I am in no way ashamed of my true identity around them because that's how close we've become.
I think that certain people have helped influence my identity. Growing up, I was one of those kids that looked at someone older than me and wanted to be like them. My Dad is a high school teacher and a coach, so I spent a lot of time at that high school (where I would eventually attend) seeing older kids. I would watch his basketball practices and picture myself being an awesome basketball player. I wanted to be that girl that people loved to watch and cheer for. I would see a new homecoming queen get crowned every year and I wanted that to be me. I have had many role models in my life that have definitely helped shape my identity. My parents were/are the most important role models in my life. Some parents I think are too concerned about shaping their child's identity. Yes, discipline and instruction are necessary tools to help children grow up to be mature and contributing members of society, but there needs to be a point where the child decides for themselves who they want to be. My parents did an amazing job with that. They have supported me my whole life and encouraged me to be the best person I can be. They instilled in my brain from a small age that I can be anything I want to be if I put my mind to it and work hard.
Identity can definitely change with time and place. That's actually one of the things I love about coming to this school, away from my hometown. Many people from the town of Fond du Lac, WI are part of a cycle. They grow up in Fondy or another small town in the area, then they go to high school at one of the three in town where they date a person that they eventually marry. After that they may or may not attend UW-Fond du Lac or another college within an hour from Fondy. Next comes marriage and raising kids that are sent to the same school their parents attended and therefore sucked into that same cycle. Now there is absolutely nothing wrong with that, but I just didn't want that to be me. It's not like I hated my town growing up and had a horrible high school experience. In fact, it was the exact opposite for me. However, I knew I wanted to get out and be able to grow up, and that's exactly what I'm able to do here. I can't come home every weekend. My friends from back home can't visit me all the time. But those are the types of things that made me grow up and become who I really am. People say that college changes people. I think that is completely true, and for me I think I changed in a good way. I have become so much more comfortable in my own skin and have been exposed to so much more than just "small town" experiences.
My identity is constantly being shaped and reshaped by the experiences I go through from day to day. I could change up my identity by associating myself with a different groups or by the clothes I wear. I could reshape my identity by switching majors and pursuing an entirely different career. All those things, though, are part of my superficial identity. I don't think my true identity, like my goals, what I believe in, how I treat other people, should constantly be shaped and reshaped. I think that those are the types of things that people should hold on to. After all, those types of things are what makes you, you. Staying true to the things that matter is what will allow you to have the closest relationships to people. Falling in love with someone's true identity is much more rewarding in the long run than falling in love with someone just based on their outward identity.
